Viruses Smell Fear and Pounce

As H1N1 makes a strategic retreat, it seems to be allowing other respiratory viruses to do its dirty-work.

Rhinovirus, RSV, adenovirus- all 'typical' cold viruses with an unusually potent maliciousness this season. Is it viral hubris?

Perhaps these will all be beaten back, but at what cost to our collective immune system?

Are we merely being softened-up for the next wave of more deadly attacks by H1N1, perhaps even in a new mutant form? Time will tell.

clipped from www.reuters.com WASHINGTON (Reuters) - Several flu-like viruses are more common than usual this flu season in the United States, adding to the misery and confusion caused by H1N1 swine flu, one lab company said on Tuesday.

Breaking News Panic Alert Round-up

Be very afraid! The news on the swine flu front is all bad.  A deceptive calm pervades, on the heels of an impotent CDC whimper that cases may have peaked in the US.

We at the Center for Swine Flu Panic warned in June of 2009 that there was a likelihood that the situation could reach a meta-stable point and then rush headlong into disaster, through the background process of:

ANTIGENIC SHIFT.  Did anyone listen?

True to that prescient reportage, scientists in Norway are RIGHT NOW investigating  mutant H1N1 that has the potential for infiltrating the lungs more deeply, causing more severe disease and higher mortality!

Meanwhile, our pharmacological bulwark is being washed over by a tidal wave of DRUG-RESISTANT STRAINS of the virus.

In the shadows of a cold Ukrainian night, a plane lands on an airstrip with its lights turned-off, its transponder silenced by the pilot.

An extraordinary rendition is taking place. Boxes of Tamilflu are being off-loaded for the President and his cronies. Meanwhile, the terrified Ukrainian populace, having no access to this last smoldering candle of hope, reverts to Medieval superstitions:

"anxious residents have overwhelmed hospitals and pharmacies, buying up supplies of gauze masks and home remedies such as lemons and garlic. Rumors have proliferated that people are dying of a new, more lethal strain of the virus.'

How long can it be until the first round of witch trials begins? Oh, the humanity...

Technorati tags: swine flu, pandemic, h1N1, panic, Tamiflu, mutant H1N1, drug-resistant

iPhone App Offers Enhanced Real-Time Fear

That's right, if you're an iPhone user you can now receive instant alerts when Swine Flu strikes down someone in your zipcode or surrounding areas.

The level of detail will be sure to quicken your pulse, as you begin to receive updates when your neighbors fall victim to the insidious, unrelenting tornado of H1N1 virus particles.

While you can download it FREE from the iPhone app store, HealthMap offers even more if you visit their website, including a real-time global visualization of the pandemic as it washes ashore at your doorstep. You can even follow it on Twitter.

But it doesn't end there. No, HealthMap tracks all types of infectious disease outbreaks. Watch and tremble as dengue fever or E Coli march into a region near you- near your pets and children, near everyone that is dear to you.

Technorati tags: iPhone app, iPhone, swine flu, H1N1, outbreak

H1N1 is in Control: Abandon All Hope

Technorati tags: swine flu, pandemic, H1N1, vaccine, flu

Take a look at that line. It's a line of ominous portent. It's the course of a hurricane of viral particles, sweeping across the globe. The CDC estimates 22 million have succumbed to the infection. 'Nothing can be done,' was the verdict hey rendered months ago, to prevent the pandemic. Vaccine is in short supply. People are wait-listed at clinics and stand in long lines at the Town Hall, hoping their children will be among the fortunate.

Dose this sound like a nightmare, or a bad science fiction film? It is and it's called "Real Life." I don't know, maybe that's too close to MTV's "Real World." But anyway, it's real. The fever, the respiratory distress. Chills and aches and these numbers:

17,838 Hospitalizations
    672  Deaths

The government has established a dedicated website: http://flu.gov/

I wonder if they had to pay large sums of money to pry away the domain name from a paranoiac or if they can just seize it under provisions of the Patriot Act? Someone should look into this.

Looking Out For #1

As you can see from the headline in our local print newspaper, Swine Flu has begun its unrelenting, grinding death march through our town.

No one has died- yet. But here at the Center for Swine Flu Panic, our studies have shown that the premature introduction of certain words into the collective unconscious hastens the development of panic and increases the overall anxiety level in the community at-large.

If you examine my arm, above the paper, you will see that I have a bandage over the injection site where I received my Sanofi H1N1 vaccination. Did you know that, if you misspell H1N1 you can spell hini? The hini, or 'heinie' was once a popular location for shots, and is still used for certain substances, such as gamma globulin. Gamma globulin is collected from human blood and, in the past, was subject to HIV contamination. I haven't fact-checked that, but someone told me and it sounds pretty scary. Keep it in mind if you ever have it administered.

Anyway, as they say on the airplane safety video 'if the mask drops, take care of your own needs before your child's needs.' Heeding this advice, I had my injection administered on last Thursday, while my 4 year-old has to wait until today. Then tomorrow she will plunge into the cesspool of pathogens known as pre-school.

Cheers! Clyde

Technorati tags: swine flu, flu outbreak in New Jersey

Chinese Plague Outbreak Provides Needed Summer Vacation from Swine Flu Worries

In case you missed it, The Plague is on the march, again. When it peaked in Europe in 1348-1350, it left around 50% of the population alive. That's the good news. The bad news is that the current outbreak is the pneumonic variant, spread through inhalation- the errant sneeze or unnoticed cough, which kills in 24 hours.

So you can stop worrying about Swine Flu until Autumn, when we'll see if the biological Cuisinart of Nature rearranges its genome into something more fiercely lethal.

Meanwhile, though the mortality rate of the Bubonic Plague, characterized by the grossly-swollen lymph nodes, or buboes, suffered by the victims, was about 80%, for the inhalation form- the pneumonic plague- the mortality rate is more like 95%.

So what do you do when your Western Chinese town has experienced 3 deaths, 10 ill, and the village has been sealed-off as a quarantine measure? Why, flee, of course! Remember, its only a plane-ride away...

clipped from www.google.com

People trying to flee China plague town

BEIJING — Residents of a town in northwest China where three people have died from pneumonic plague said Wednesday scared people were trying to leave despite a strict quarantine to contain the virulent disease.

A fourth person was near death in Ziketan, a remote town of 10,000 people in a Tibetan area of Qinghai province, the official Xinhua news agency said.

Another patient was in serious condition and seven others were infected, most of them relatives of the first fatality, a 32-year-old herdsman.

Local authorities have quarantined the town, which is about 200 kilometres (125 miles) southwest of the provincial capital Xining, and its vicinity but some people were trying to flee, residents said.

Great Source for N95 Bird Flu Defender Masks

Ordinarily, the Center for Swine Flu Panic eschews product endorsements. However, in this case we believe that we've found the right protection at the right cost.

Now we want to see everyone, young and old together, and middle-aged as well, and teenagers (possibly), strolling confidently down the boulevard, holding each others' hypo-allergenic neoprene-gloved hands, and wearing the N95 avian flu defender mask. Perhaps someone will sneeze into theirs. No cause for alarm! The pathogens will be safely confined within the mask. Clean-up is a breeze with this low-cost model. Simply incinerate, and you're done!